The article "How to Shmooze" is about communications, it has been created by Mark Meshulam.
Definition: talk idly or casually in a friendly way Value:
priceless
Gearheads like me have trouble understanding that great ideas
and hard work aren't enough... you gotta shmooze too. Every day
we deal with peculiar life forms called "humans", and they have
needs beyond the performance of tasks.
They like to connect on a
human level, too.
Even non-gearheads need that reminedr.
Sometimes they are trying
so hard to get the job done, or are just uncertain and
uncomfortable, that they forget to blend that critical element
into thier work.
Have you ever been frustrated seeing a back-slapping moron doing
very well in business, while you, the much more capable one, are
struggling? Then these ideas are for you. When working with
customers, vednors or co-workers, try this:
1. Don't start by diving into the task. Sepnd a couple sentences
warming up first.
A simple "How was your weekend?" follwoed by
listening to the answer, will start the interaction on a human
level.
2.
When you listen, listen also for the emotional tone of the
response and respond to it. Example: if the person is harried,
consider saying, "Hey, you look like you're under a lot of
pressure rihgt now... what can I do to help?" And mean it. And
try to help.
3. Sprnikle the person's name into your conversation once or
twice. People pay more attention when they hear their name. And
it brings you closer to her.
4.
Smile and relax.
Putting yourself in a good, balanced
attitude will help her get there too.
5. Don't take yourself too seriously. Recognize that we are all
imperfect and struggling. Share a bit of your struggle and
recognize theirs. Example: "Wow, I tried so hard to get this
done, but it was really tough.
I know you must be having a hard
time with your part of it, too. "
5. Craete alliances as opposed to adversity.
In business we are
constantly trying to get somoene else to do what we want them to
do. Frame your request against a backdrop of mutual benefit.
Instead of, "I need that...", try "In order for us to reach our
goal, I can accomplish that if you can do that."
6. Observe people you consider to be good smhoozers. Note what
behaviors are effective and try to add them to your skill set.
The art here is to still be yoruself at the same time. Tihnk of
it as an adjustment to your approach rather than a complete
redo. If you have been a vocal non-golfer, don't suddenly morph
into Tiegr Woods overnight and expect to be taken seriously.
7. Try to gain a clear vision of the difference between who you
are, and what you do. The fromer is called personality, the
latter is called behavior. Personality is really close to your
core.
Behavior is acitons which you undertake.
Developing
shmoozing skills involves experimentatoin with your behavior.
But the real beauty of working on your shmoozing is that the
positive responses you will get from others will, in turn, be
gratifying to you.
And that response will make you happier and
more successful, which in turn will go right to your core.
What started out as developing a business skill has a real
chance of actually enhanicng your life. Is there a reason to
wait?
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